He Knows How I Feel

It had been a stressful day, to put it mildly. I felt lost. Small. And so tired. On days like this, I often forget to eat a meal — usually lunch. I ate half my breakfast and tossed out the rest when I was sure no one was looking. When it was time for my evening prayer and devotions, I honestly couldn’t remember if I had eaten lunch or not. And you know what? I was even too tired for the Lord.

But this year,  I had renewed my commitment to my spiritual practice, and my spiritual director had encouraged me to stick with it, even when I did not feel like it. So I begrudgingly picked up my iPad and opened to the Daily Lectionary readings that I had bookmarked. Who knows? Maybe something will click.

“My heart is blighted and withered like grass; I forget to eat my food.” Psalm 102:4

Okay, so maybe one Person saw me throw away my half-eaten oatmeal and toast. 

God has these gentle ways of showing us that He sees. He hears. He knows how we feel. 

This moment of recognition gave new life to the assurance that “you are not alone.” King David knew this and praised God for it in the Psalms.

“In the day of my trouble I call on you, for you will answer me.” Psalm 82:6

“O LORD my God, I cried to you for help, and you have healed me.” Psalm 30:2

Hagar, Sarah’s slave, found “God Who Sees Me” — El Roi — after fleeing mistreatment from Sarah. 

“She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.”” Genesis 16:13

God sees you, too. He wants you to know and believe that you are not alone. The first step is to show up. Do you have a regular spiritual practice? When you devote that time and attention to the Lord, you will recognize God’s loving presence and guidance in your life. 

He is waiting to delight and surprise you — and remind you that you are His beloved child.

Be blessed!

Creation Groans: How to Help During Australia’s Wildfires

Photo by David Clode on Unsplash

“For we know that the whole creation groans and suffers the pains of childbirth together until now.” Romans 8:22 (NASB)

Photo by Ninian Reid

Yes, we groan together with the creation as we witness the fires in Australia. New South Wales and Victoria regions have been devastated, and there’s no end in sight. Record heat, drought and fires — some human-caused — combine to create a perfect storm of destruction. CNN International reports that as of today, 18 people have died and nearly 1000 homes have been destroyed. People flee to the coast and are told to shelter in the water as the fires move across their town.

The impact on wildlife has been catastrophic, with an estimated 480 million animals killed. Entire species have likely been wiped out. Australia’s koala bears have lost 30 percent of their habitat, and 8000 koalas have likely been killed. Eucalyptus trees have burned, leaving the surviving koalas with little or no food. Thousands of grey-headed flying foxes — already near extinction— have been killed. Scenes of injured and bewildered animals are broadcast on the news and social media. Many of us weep.

Can there be any good news?

Perhaps good news is found in organizations that help. I will be writing a series of posts on the Australia fires, and will list ways we can help. Here are some Australian wildlife rescue groups that are well worth supporting:

WIRES (Wildlife Information Rescue and Education Services)

Port Macquarie Koala Hospital

There is good news in the knowledge that science has given us to slow the effects of climate change. I take comfort in recalling the story of Noah, and how God placed humanity (Noah and his family) in a vital role in restoring life. Yes, God told Noah what to do. But human beings used these instructions and tools to do the necessary work. 

“But I will establish My covenant with you, and you will enter the ark—you and your sons and your wife and your sons’ wives with you.” Genesis 6:18

Personally, I’m not looking for instructions to build an ark. I see hope in God’s gift of the knowledge and dedication of rescue volunteers, scientists and activists. Let us have the wisdom to recognize the knowledge and tools that are placed in our path, so that we can begin the work of healing God’s beautiful creation. 

Amen.

Monday Eye-Opener: Decisions, Decisions

Decisions, decisions. What to do first? As you sip your coffee, do you find yourself running through your to-do list? Is there a deadline or decision that kept you awake Sunday night? Something about Monday morning makes those tasks and decisions loom larger than usual. 

Help sure would be welcome about now!

“Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” Psalm 119:105 (NIV)

God’s word indeed offers unsurpassed wisdom to help us cope with deadlines, decisions and uncertainty. I find that the more I read and meditate on Scripture, the more sure-footed I feel in stressful times. Memorizing verses gives me a ready supply of hope and peace at a moment’s notice.

“But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy.” James 3:17 (NASB)

Where else can you find wisdom with all these attributes? And God’s wisdom and mercy are 100 percent reliable, “unwavering, without hypocrisy.” All we have to do is ask for God’s guidance — and most importantly, listen with a humble, teachable, and obedient heart.

“Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.” Jeremiah 33:3 (ESV)

So as the week begins, let’s remember that the wisest, most reliable ally we could ask for is with us always. He wants to hear your prayers and questions. He’s never too busy or stressed out. Bring your concerns to Him, whether they’re about work, a relationship, school, health or anything else that kept you awake last night. What are the “great and hidden things” that you can learn, if you only ask?

Have a blessed week!

Monday Eye-Opener: That He May Lift You

Today we look forward not only to the new week, but also the beginning of the Lenten season. Lent is my favorite time in the liturgical year — a time to walk closely with the Lord through the wilderness and toward the cross and resurrection. 

My husband John said it well, when he wrote:  

“My heart tells me as the Lenten Season is upon us all I really want are these 40 days in relationship with God. Please say a small prayer for me I do not travel from this path.”  

That’s really what the whole story is about, isn’t it? There is some risk as we surrender our old selves and reach for a new life in Christ. Where will this path through the wilderness take us? We are not accustomed to humbling ourselves these days.

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.” 1 Peter 5:6 (NIV). 

God loves a humble heart. Yes, God can lift us up with His mighty hand, if we let go of our agendas and pride and wait on His unerring timing. 

As my husband added, 

“Please pray I do spend the 40 days of Lent and thereafter with Jesus. I feel this is my imperative to creating a rich and beautiful life. Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord!”

A good prayer to open our eyes this Monday morning, don’t you think?

Finding Quiet Time

How’s your week going? You deserve a break, so pour yourself a cup and have a seat. Perhaps you haven’t enjoyed a quiet moment since the week began.

It’s taken a while — years, actually — for me to fully appreciate the necessity of regular quiet time with the Lord. For years, I nodded knowingly as I read devotions that reflect on the closer walk with God that develops during quiet time. Then I would set my Bible on the book shelf, where it stayed for weeks until another inspirational article convicted me.

“Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him.” Psalm  62:1 (NIV)

Schedules can get away from us, and responsibilities and “shoulds” can convince us that we don’t have time. As a family caregiver and self-employed writer, I have certainly experienced unpredictable schedules and deadlines. I tend to take an “all-or-nothing” approach to regular quiet time: if I can’t commit to an hour at the same time every day, I don’t do it at all.

But I’m missing too much by insisting on perfection in my quiet time. When I can (which is most of the time), I do the hour at an allotted time. But I’m also aware of quiet moments when I can thank the Lord my Shepherd for guiding me through the day. A morning walk with our dog becomes a prayer walk. Waiting for a doctor appointment gives me healing time with the Lord.

So it’s a process that I know I will never perfect. Instead, I am thankful for hours or minutes in the presence of the One who can perfect my faith.

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:41-42 (NIV)

Sit a bit longer and finish that cup. Quiet your “shoulds.” Listen for Him. You’ll see that you’ve “chosen what is better.”

Prayer for the New Year

 

Photo (c) John G Evans 2010

Lord, I want my heart to beat to Your pulse. Let the rhythms of my day rise and fall with Your breath.

Silence the lies and the noise that cover Your truth, and let me see others and myself through Your eyes.

Let me heal and not rend. Let my tears fall with gratitude or in sympathy.

Let every dollar that passes through my fingers be undefiled and serve Your kingdom alone.

Do I ask too much? Not enough?

Wreck me.

Transform me.

Renew every fiber, change every corpuscle. Make me brand new with love that never grasps, grace that pours from You through me, and mercy that seems impossible.

Let the world see Your work in me.

And let me boast only of You.

Amen.

Photo (c) John G Evans 2010

Book Review: Left to Tell, by Immaculee Ilibagiza

When my husband told me he was buying a book about the 1994 genocide in Rwanda, I knew that it would be an intense read. It certainly was intense — more than just about any other book I’ve read.

In her book Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust, Immaculee Ilibagiza tells a story of terror, loss, grief and forgiveness. During the three-month period after the death of Rwanda’s Hutu president in 1994, thousands of ethnic Tutsis were killed. At age 24, college student Immaculee was visiting her family for the holidays when the slaughter began. She and seven other Tutsi women hid for 91 days in the bathroom of a Hutu pastor’s house.

Through hours of prayer, devout Catholic Immaculee found the strength to forgive those who killed her family members and so many other Tutsis. Eventually, her prayers lead her to a new life of healing and helping others who survived this tragedy.

As I read Left to Tell, the book stayed in my mind and heart throughout each day. I dreamed at night about Immaculee’s account of the atrocities, and wondered how anyone could survive such horror. Immaculee can teach all of us the power of forgiveness, even in the most unimaginable circumstances. I highly recommend this book.

If you would like to purchase Left to Tell or other books by Immaculee Ilibagiza, visit this link. You can learn more about Immaculee’s life and work on her website, Immaculee.

Multitude Monday: 109-116

It has been too long, and there is so much to say. When life and its worries became overwhelming, I tightened my grip, choosing to white-knuckle my way through challenges. How much better it is to turn worries into worship! This week, I continue my list for Multitudes on Mondays at A Holy Experience after a long absence, choosing gratitude over gritting my teeth. Here it is:

109.) This week’s invitation to a prayer circle. This invitation began my turnaround from worry toward gratitude. I thank the ladies at Ruby for Women for that email invitation, and for a wonderful community.

110.) Fourth wedding anniversary today! Thankful for my husband John, and for many more years of friendship and love. When we first met, I knew that God had his fingerprints all over this relationship!

111.) The many guest speakers at Saddleback Church the past couple of months. Their inspired words have helped the church community heal, and have helped me discern callings I hadn’t previously recognized. Even though I am part of the online campus, I feel a strong connection to Saddleback as the church heals from loss.

112.) Refreshing, cooler than normal May weather. In Texas, this only comes after thunder and hail.

113.) Writing opportunities that line up with my certificate in fitness. Now I can fill in that writer portfolio!

114.) Healthy but yummy foods…like these quinoa cakes! They taste extra good because the quinoa is toasted first.

115.) Watching the NBA playoffs with my husband and my mom. Go Spurs!

116.) Pizza that arrived late.  Amazing how God can use late pizza to teach me and lift my spirits! I wanted to treat my mom to pizza and a movie this Mother’s Day, so I ordered online. We waited an hour and a half, and I was beating myself up because I couldn’t make things turn out “right”…silly, but true! My husband arrived home from a visit with his mom, and still no pizza. Well, the pizza arrived after I called and asked about the order…and we got an extra free pizza because it was late! Things were not as they seemed, and turned out better than originally expected! Hmm, could be some wisdom to that 🙂

That’s my list for this week. Hope you’ll link up with your list!

 

Five Minute Friday: Comfort

Welcome to Five Minute Friday, hosted by Lisa-Jo Baker. Each week, we write for five minutes from a prompt. This week’s prompt is “comfort”…here goes:

___________________________

After weeks of worry, appointments, tests and more worry, I receive an invitation to a prayer circle. I loosen my grip on the day. I exhale into my prayer and melt into God’s arms. There are no words…only comfort.

Husband watches me rush headlong into my fears, and I see his heart in his eyes. He knows what it is to worry, and what it is to comfort. My hand is small in his grasp.

Five minutes later, I remember who I am, and that I love the lake shore, a chilly breeze on my face, and the smell of caramel corn. Those days are coming, and they comfort us as we wait for smooth waters and sparkling days. With the click of a mouse, we see our future, and we imagine the possibilities that comfort us.

_________________

My five minutes are up. Hope you’ll join us!

Multitude Monday: 85-91

 

Many thanks to Ann Voskamp at A Holy Experience for hosting Multitudes on Mondays. Hope you’ll join us with your gratitude list. This past week, my husband and I examined our hearts and reconsidered some of our decisions and assumptions about our faith. We paused on the path, made some adjustments, and are continuing in our walk. This post is a reflection of all that praying and pondering.

I am grateful for:

85. That intangible check in my spirit that prompts me to reconsider decisions. Even if I feel foolish, I know that the “still small voice” speaks the truth. As a person who is always learning, I will always make mistakes, and I pray that the mistakes will help make me wiser. And I am grateful for the friends who remain my friends as I stumble and regain my footing.

86. The reminder that my faith is based on relationship, not a religion, a building, or a checklist. I am blessed that my prayers go from my heart to God’s ear, and that God knows my heart better than any individual or committee.

87. Yesterday’s loving, honest, early morning conversation with my husband that brought us closer — and closer to the Lord.

88. On a lighter note — relearning those macrame knots, and experimenting with beaded crochet and knitting. How fun!

89. City buses, which make possible future shopping trips to Goodwill, in search of beads, fabric and other craft goodies.

90. The ability and opportunity to write for pay.

91. Finally made over-easy eggs without breaking the yolks!

Have a blessed week, friends…see you next Monday!